Mi sento un fallito, invece...domani e' un altro giorno (loosely translated...obviously)

Today has been a not so good day! :(

It started out okay and I was hopeful for the first day of class. I was excited to wear my houndstooth scarf, in preparation for this weekend! :) I was able to eat just yogurt for breakfast (and the other half of a Fiber One bar) by just going to the kitchen before 8, which Guenda said yesterday would be just fine. I think I will have to do this most days so that I actually have time to get to class on time. Also, it keeps them from giving (and insisting that I eat) me more food than I feel comfortable eating. So then I got my stuff together and I was off. I felt somewhat confident in how to get to school; I only had to look at the map for a few quick references, so I was pretty excited about that!!

I arrived at school about 20 minutes early, which gave me time to read my email/facebook one last time...and send a few emails! I went to the front desk to ask where I was supposed to be, because they do not like to tell you anything around here. It is very frustrating for me because I like to know where I am supposed to be and what I am supposed to be doing. Plus, I dont know how to ask all of these things in Italian; which I suppose I should look it up and write it down! However, the list of things that I am unsure of how to say could be a 500 pg novel at this point. So, they show me to my classroom and luckily a few minutes later, Fiona showed up! I was glad to see a friendly face.

From here, it all goes down hill. So, if you do not care to hear me "complain" or vent then you should probably stop reading right here and wait for tomorrow's blog. Class started and IMMEDIATELY I could tell that this was going to be a bit over my head...however, "a bit" was an understatement. I have forgotten so much of my Italian that it isn't even funny! Fiona has been here a month and just finished the first level class and the other guy speaks fluent Spanish so he isn't having much trouble, and then there is me...who is SO lost that I want to cry. I can barely understand what she is saying and when she asked me questions I had to have her repeat them or word them differently so that I could just understand. But then I have to answer and in my brain I am thinking, "is that really what she said; how should I answer; how can I answer when I dont know all of the necessary vocabulary; etc, etc". So by the time we got a 15 minute break I was convinced that I was just going to ask to move to the level below this one...which at this point IS TOTALLY FINE WITH ME!! Fiona is convinced that I will start to remember and that because I have already learned everything that they cover in the first one that I will be board...however, I dont remember all of that so I think it might be more beneficial than wanting to cry every day. So I stick it out for the last part of the class and clearly the teacher can read my mind because she asks me if I want to move to the level below...and she takes me to meet the other teacher and we explain the situation and she says to come to her class on Thursday and Friday and see what I think. If I want to stay I can and if I want to return to the 2nd level then I can do that. However, we dont make it very far with that before the first level teacher, Rebecca, comes to me and says that for The Univ. of Alabama you have to take at least the 2nd level. I explain that I am not here for credit and she says that it should be fine then.

So I run to the restroom and I know that I am supposed to be in another class, but because no one tells you anything, I have no clue where I am supposed to be. So I have to ask and when I do, the receptionist lady tells me that I cannot go to the level below because Gabriella (director) would not like it and that she wants me to get the most out of the course because I paid money for it. SHe says that I can play catch up in the individual lessons and stay in the 2nd level group classes. At this point I am thinking, "it is NOT worth my money to feel the way I feel right this minute; which is on the verge of tears." I was sooooo frustrated, but I just agreed and had her show me to the next class. It was just a man speaking to us. He was talking about fascism and the only reason I understood ANY of what he was saying was because I took a full semester of fascism with Maurizio. However, I didn't truly understand like the other 3 girls did (Fiona and two girls from another class), but I nodded my head and agreed as though I understood. I was SO thankful when all of this was over because I thought my head was going to explode.

Fiona and her roommate were going to lunch at the place where we have vouchers to eat, the same place I ate yesterday, and they wanted to all go together. I was so grateful to have people to eat with. Her roommate is really nice. She went to Oxford for her undergrad and got her masters in Art or something at a school in London. They didn't know each other before this though. She was really nice. Again, like Fiona, I dont think that she is someone I would normally hang out with, but at this point I just want to have people around. SO we ate lunch and I thought I was going to be sick. I had the same vegetables as yesterday, but I ordered spaghetti alla carbonara. As soon as I saw the plate of it, I knew this was a mistake. Seriously, how do the Italians eat so much!?!?!? I didn't even eat half of it, which the waiter was disappointed with, but I just couldn't do it!! It was great though to have people to sit and talk to.

We then went back to the school to use the computers. They are both in the same class that Fiona went to on Monday and they were going on an art walk with that class at 3. So, I went to walk around some. My goal was to make it to this place that Ashley told me about. However, I got half way there (over the Ponte Vecchio and back to the Piazza de Pitti) and just did not feel well at all. The best part of the walk though was finding another stationary store. I think I might have to give in and buy a wax stamp thingy or one of the less expensive pens. I love the marbled paper just like I knew I would. It's becoming hard to resist, but I am trying to to buy things this first week (other than the Harry Potter).

I sat down for a few minutes thinking that maybe I just needed to sit down for a minute...I was WRONG!! I started making my way back to the apartment, which at this point was like a 45 minute walk (the better to burn off calories though). I did walk into the "Italian Apparel" store, which was NOTHING like American Apparel. I stopped and bought two post cards...I haven't really seen any that I love; they are all cheap looking. So, do not be discouraged if you do not receive a post card right away. I am in search of some better looking post cards.

Once I got back to the apartment, I read emails/checked facebook/sent emails and then I laid down. I ended up getting under the covers and setting an alarm. I think I slept for about an hour and a half all together, which was AMAZING!!! I think the combination of the food and all of the cigarette smoke is making me sick at my stomach. So not only will I have lung cancer when I get back, but I will no longer be able to stand cigarette smoke AT ALL; not that I can now, but seriously, when I come back home I will probably slap every cigarette out of the hands of anyone who can't beat the crap out of me when I do. It is seriously one of THE MOST unattractive habits IN THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!

Now I am going to study some and then eat dinner. I do not anticipate eating very much for dinner; I will just have to tell them that I have a stomach ache (ho mal di pancia). I suppose I should go study. When I suck at something or I dont get it...I STUDY!! I suppose this will be no different, except that the test will be in learning to speak and not being so hesitant.

Also, there will probably not be any pictures today. The picture uploader doesn't like me...it still wont let me upload the picture from last night! :(

Dinner...well tonight was the best food we've had so far. I couldn't eat very much (though still more than normal I suppose), but it was really good. We started out with MY FAVORITE: penne pasta with olive oil (though this may have been some butter) and parmesean cheese. I would have been fine to stop there! :) However, I tried the chicken and beef that was cooked in something that was AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was yellowish...and then some vegetables that were really good! It was just Signora Gabriella, Guenda, Lorenzo, and I for dinner tonight. It was nice because it wasn't a huge production that took an hour and a half! :) SO, now I have to study, take a shower, and go back to sleep! :) I hope that my stomach feels better tomorrow. I also hope that I dont have to eat much food tomorrow!! Weirdest part of dinner was when I said that my stomach was hurting and they were asking me why and I said "troppo cibo" (too much food), Lorenzo asked if it was "period". Awkward...what man asks that of a female he doesn't know?!?! Oh well. Whatever! I just took a shower and now I am going to study some and then go to bed!!

I hope tomorrow is a better day!! I hope that it will start coming back to me like everyone else seems to think it will!!! Prayers accepted and appreciated!!! :) I will definitely be praying over this whole situation! Though today Isaiah 41:10 came to my rescue again... "Do not be discouraged, for I am your God." I tried so hard not to be discouraged...I failed at it today, but perhaps tomorrow!! As Scarlett would say, "After all...tomorrow is another day"

BEST PART OF THE DAY: skype calls with Erin and my momma & daddy!! :) What a great way to end a not so good day! :)

Adding pictures because it is finally working:
Pretty trees in one of the parks i walk through to get to the apartment. The sinks in the bathroom at the school...the foot pedals are weird...but much more sanitary than sink handles, etc.
Police Car and view from the other side of the Ponte vecchio