Victory, Glory, & Chains

This morning in church were were singing, and thankfully they were songs that I had the lyrics to, and I just needed to record these thoughts.

The first song says:
"La vittoria abbiam
in Gesu' nostra bandiera
la vittoria abbiam in Gesu'
Grazie diamo a Dio
che ci da la vittoria"

Translation:
We have victory in Jesus.
Thank you God for giving us victory!

The second song says:
"Quanto bello, sei tu Gesu'
Le tue parole, ed il tuo amore
Quanto  glorioso, sei tu Gesu'
E il tuo potere, fu la tua croce. 

Quella che mi salvo' 
Mi riscatto' 
Per un momento li' 
Mi dono' liberta'

Ti do gloria, gloria, 
Ti do gloria, gloria
Ti do gloria, gloria, 
A te Gesu'" 

Translation:
How beautiful you are Jesus,
your word, your love.
How glorious you are Jesus,
And your power, it was your cross.

What saved me
Ransomed me
For a moment there,
freed me.

To you I give glory
To you Jesus.

The third song talks about Jesus breaking chains.

SO, the reason that I was particularly moved by these words this morning is because over the past few days I was able to read some things that I wrote a few years ago, and I was just struck by my words.  Today I am grateful for the broken chains of depression, sadness, anger, loneliness, the inability to forgive, and more.  In reading my own words I remember the physical, emotional, and mental anguish I was in, but at the same time I read my words and see God's work in my life.  He promises joy in the mourning, which he delivered (i.e. my grad school loves, friends, mentors, children, co-workers, etc).  However, I can now see the joy that he has given me AFTER the mourning.  So, I am grateful for the victory that he has given me in life, but also the victory I have over depression, sadness, anger, loneliness, etc. etc.  I give Him the glory for it, because left to my own devices, I would still be in that hole, and I would still be hurting.  Those chains are broken and for that I am so grateful!  

Without God's grace and mercy, I would not be the person I am today!  The smile that you all see in my pictures, would not be there!  The beauty of my smile at this point in my life, is that it is not a smile meant to mask depression, pain, sadness, anger, regret (ehh...I truly regret very little in life..and instead rely on God's grace and mercy and the lessons that life teaches me), frustration, sadness, etc; instead, the smile you see today is a reflection of the joy that comes AFTER the mourning; the joy that God gives and allows! 

The afternoon was good!  I went for a walk, looked at some clothes, wrote a lot of blogs.  I did have a breakdown over missing my momma!  I had to call her because I miss her!  I wish she could bring my daddy and my animals to Italy with her!

I talked to Sarah Mason tonight too!  It is her birthday, and I was so excited to talk to that sweet girl!  I don't think she knows how much I love her, and how much she makes me laugh!

Nick and I had some good laughs tonight!  The moment where we were on skype video, cell phone, facebook chat, and emailing...that was the moment we realized that our weirdness and dorkiness matches the others, and no one else will appreciate our weirdness!!  I love laughing with him!

Also, Erin told me that she and Meagan were supposed to book plane tickets tonight...WHAAA????